English Judges
Being a 3rd year law student, I've come to certain conclusions about English law in general, and English judges in particular.When I first started, I wondered why, with all their education and smarts, they couldn't seem to construct a proper sentence in English. I wondered why they were so convoluted and confused. I wondered, most of all, whether they knew of the existence and meaning of the comma and full stop, since those were so rarely used.
After 2 and a half years of torture, of taking 10 minutes to read a single paragraph and another 20 minutes trying to figure out what the heck they were trying to say, all those agonizing moments reconstructing sentences and trying to make sense of them, wondering why they said 'not unnecessary' when they could have said 'necessary', I've formed certain theories:
1) English judges and lawyers (whether practicing or academic) love to flaunt their so-called smarts. After all, if they studied so hard, worked so hard, why not use it fully, right?
2) They love being part of an exclusive elite. It gives their fragile ego a huge boost. Typical high-nosed snobbery. I imagine they love to turn their noses up in the air, hmph-ing at us idiotic, illiterate laypeople. Makes them feel powerful. Of course, someone should tell them that walking with noses up in the air is bad for their health. They'd drown easily when it rains.
3) They have no idea what they're doing either. And finally...
4) Those people just plain can't speak English.
After 2 and a half years of torture, of taking 10 minutes to read a single paragraph and another 20 minutes trying to figure out what the heck they were trying to say, all those agonizing moments reconstructing sentences and trying to make sense of them, wondering why they said 'not unnecessary' when they could have said 'necessary', I've formed certain theories:
1) English judges and lawyers (whether practicing or academic) love to flaunt their so-called smarts. After all, if they studied so hard, worked so hard, why not use it fully, right?
2) They love being part of an exclusive elite. It gives their fragile ego a huge boost. Typical high-nosed snobbery. I imagine they love to turn their noses up in the air, hmph-ing at us idiotic, illiterate laypeople. Makes them feel powerful. Of course, someone should tell them that walking with noses up in the air is bad for their health. They'd drown easily when it rains.
3) They have no idea what they're doing either. And finally...
4) Those people just plain can't speak English.
posted by sleepypurplepiglet at 5:46 PM
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