Give Me Back...

Okay. Remember many posts ago, how I was moaning about English judges and their awful English?

I retract my opinion. I am sorry for all the complaints I made about them, and for all the vitriolic antagonism I felt towards their usage of English.

This is because - and I'm quite surprised that I'm surprised, because honestly, what else could I expect? - I've finally found something worse than the English used by English judges and in the law texbooks.

What's worse than that? fellow students who have been through what I've been through may ask.

Well, just you wait. Just you wait till you read some Malaysian Law textbooks.

Worse than all the convoluted, one-unending-sentence-per-paragraph, someone-stole-all-the-commas mess favored by the English lawyers, judges, and academicians, are the Malaysian English half-baked sentences that commit suicide in the middle of trying to get their point across.

Spelling mistakes, horrible punctuation, senseless sentences, wrong usage of words - atrocious English! And this, by practicing lawyers!!!

O, woe! Weep and lament for the sad state the English language has found herself in!

The horror of it all!

I'm truly repentant now. Give me back my convoluted sentences! Give me back the long paragraphs with missing commas! Give me back the dry British wit! At least I could understand them, even though the process takes quite awhile. At least their English, although ostentatious, was perfect! No stupid mistakes, no wrong usage of words.

Give me back the British English and my English judges!!! :(